Preached At THE HOUSEHOLD OF GOD ONITSHA By APOSTLE PETER ODOEMENA THE SON OF MAN THE SUPREME INTELLIGENCE © BRIDE OF CHRIST MINISTRY WORLD-WIDE
SECTION ONE
CHAPTER 1
INTRODUCTION
When there is peace in the family, God is in that family and sicknesses and diseases can hardly pervade that family.
All the messiahs that have been sent to the world by Almighty God had emphasized the
need for God’s people to dwell here on earth in peace and to live in peace among themselves.
2. This is so because God is the author of peace and can only dwell in a peaceful environment. Peace is a prerequisite in any family that desires to move forward and attain progress. It is an unavoidable ingredient in a family menu.
3. Many people today preach the necessity for peace in every facet of human life and association but the way of peace they know not.
4. Nothing can substitute peace in any godly family. A family cannot blend without peace. Children raised in any family without peace must be violent and hooligans.
5. When there is peace in the family, God is in that family and sicknesses and diseases can hardly pervade that family.
6. A peaceful home is a happy home. Money can provide a good mansion and a wonderful interior or exterior decoration but money cannot provide peace.
7. This peace is an enduring one that transcends from the Prince of Peace, The Father of the Faithfuls whose desire for His children is that they may live in perfect peace and harmony devoid of bitterness, rancour, acrimony and sorrow.
8. This brief sermon offers to you by divine guidance and revelation, a guide and a sure bridge to the Lord of Peace.
CHAPTER 2
ALIENS AND TEMPORARY RESIDENTS WITH EXEMPLARY CONDUCTS
First of all, I want you to see yourself as a child of God. Secondly… you are likened to a city that is seated on a mountain that cannot be hid. Thirdly, as a cynosure of all eyes because you are a foreigner with a strange behaviour. Lastly, that you are surrounded by a large crowd of witnesses with different aims and objectives.
A person who stands out as being very different from the people of the community in which he lives, is often viewed with distrust and suspicion. His conduct may come under closer observation and scrutiny than that of natives of the area.
2. Sadly, some individuals may become prejudiced against a family, race, tribe or nationality because of the misconduct of a single foreigner in their neighbourhood.
3. Even governments make laws and regulations that apply only to aliens. If a foreigner’s conduct is regarded as undesirable, he may be deported.
4. Why is all these of serious concern to the child of God? How should it affect his or her way of life?
5. First of all, I want you to see yourself as a child of God. Secondly, as a child of God, you are likened to a city that is seated on a mountain that cannot be hid. Thirdly, as a cynosure of all eyes because you are a foreigner with a strange behaviour. Lastly, that you are surrounded by a large crowd of witnesses with different aims and objectives.
6. In this world, true children of God are aliens and temporary residents for they are earnestly and desperately looking forward to a permanent abiding place devoid of violence, hardship, sorrow, pain, death etc and this is the promised “Paradise” of God where God Himself will rule His children the world over in righteousness and peace.
7. This promise has been ridiculed into oblivion by many because to them it has over delayed. I wish to affirm here that this age long promise is as real as your experience in the faith of the Son of Man if you are actually in His faith or have been acquainted with His faith.
8. How, when and where this promise will be fulfilled and the possible beneficiary, is not my exhortation for now please.
9. Believe it if you can: there is a hidden purpose why the sovereign God demands worship from all His children scattered all over the world and whoever obeys will not regret it forever.
10. When genuine disciples of Christ strive to think and act in harmony and in conformity with the teachings of Christ (the Anointed One, the Messiah) unbelievers or renegades or those who make only pretence of practicing His teachings may look down on them as though they are undesirable foreigners.
11. The views of these counterfeit children of God that are mixed up with you in your congregations or that of the unbelieving world around you, should not make you as a child of God to begin to feel ashamed or doubtful of your conviction with your professed faith in Christ.
12. From the divine standpoint, your alien status as a child of God, is one of virtue and dignity that is enviable.
13. You may not know that sometimes, people around you envy your behaviour as a foreigner and would even desire to be like you even without making it known to you.
14. Every true child of God as a foreigner will like to do his utmost to conduct himself in a way that does not give anyone valid reason for reproaching God his Father.
15. While writing to his followers in his own day, Apostle Peter called attention to their honourable standing as aliens and strangers as can be read in I Peter 1:1-2. He described them in this passage as aliens and temporary residents scattered abroad.
16. You should recall to mind here also that in the Book of Esther, children of God that time were said to be scattered all over the world with traditions and customs different from all other people even the countries where they found themselves.
17. They were accused of not willing to be influenced by the customs, culture and tradition of communities where they sojourned temporarily and for that they were declared undesirable elements.
18. No true child of God walks by sight but by divine revelation.
19. Any true child of God that is influenced away from his or her conviction of what he or she knows to be the truth. from God on any matter; be it conduct, order or doctrine, must have walked by sight and no longer by divine revelation!
20. You cannot desire or imitate the world’s way of talking, dressing, drinking, eating etc, until you are out of the way of truth.
21. Since we have recognized ourselves as children of the Most High God, as aliens and temporary residents in this fast passing system of things, we can no longer afford to allow ourselves to become unduly attached to anything within the now existing human framework
22. No earthly ties, sorrows, joys or possessions are permanent. Time and unforeseen occurrences befall all people and can change one’s circumstances steadily and dramatically.
23. Therefore, for us to be completely absorbed in sorrows and joys that are the products of these ever changing circumstances and relationships, could work against our drawing closer to the Most High God and our Creator and this must be disastrous to us.
24. The situation of the majority among us in this Bridal Faith, demonstrates very clearly that we have lost the vision of the Divine Promise of God, which He sealed with an oath, and the Divine Covenant, which He entered into with us when His glory came down among us.
25. Some are generally either not aware of God’s
Divine Promise of a better and more glorious and permanent abode with Him which will culminate into eternity, or they have no real faith in such a coming New Righteous Order from God the
Almighty even when He has confirmed the Promise in our day by vindicating His Chosen Vessel from among us to bear His Name and confirm the Promise before many witnesses.
26. The package is real but the content you do not know because this is kept as the greatest secret by the Father of us all who knows what will be our attitudes if this great secret is revealed.
27. The elect shall behold the fullness of the love of God Beyond the Curtain of Time.
28. As many as do not believe in this Divine
Promise or this Divine Order must have nothing but focus their attention in their present life’s situation.
29. Such people are myopic. They do not see afar off and can never stand the test of time. They lack a solid hope regarding the future.
30. That is why they have become so wrapped up with the world, in thinking about their daily needs and are intent on getting as much from the world as possible.
31. Their eyes light up only in the prospect of becoming millionaires, riding the best vehicles in the world, building and living in the best mansion. in the world and of course if it is possible, enslaving all that come their way with their wealth.
32. These ignorant ones among us may be hoping and seeking to impress others by means of material possessions while the love and fear of the Almighty God, the only source of human existence, has vanished completely from their hearts as evidenced by their conducts and attitudes to worship and to one another.
33. This is a delicate and dangerous condition.
There should be a prompt and positive repositioning of the heart and attitudes here.
34. If the giver of life, who you do not want to reverence again should call you home tonight, who will fulfill all your ambitions without God?
35. Please, rethink and retrace your steps before it is too late.
36. A true child of God recognizes that an eternal future lies before him. It would be foolish for him
to become so much absorbed in the affairs of this life that he has virtually no time again for his
Creator on Whom his future depends.
37. This does not mean that true children of God cannot properly enjoy many good and valuable things that money can buy or that they should live beggarly lives.
38. I am stressing here that wholesome pleasures and beneficial material possessions must never become the focal point of our lives if we really see and consider ourselves as aliens and temporary residents in this present system.
39. While not being wasteful or careless with our assets we should rightly regard them much as do trustworthy persons who merely rent a furnished apartment, tools, equipment or other items that
they may need.
40. Such persons care for these well but never
become completely attached to them as if they
were permanent possessions.
41. Our lives should show that we recognize that nothing in the present system gives any guarantee of permanence; that we are aliens and temporary residents moving forward towards the fulfilment of the promised New Order of God’s making.
CHAPTER 3
SUBMISSION WITH A GREAT REWARD
Whatever apparent appeal it might have, total independence is undesirable and unrealistic … Cause your husband to notice at a glance that, when compared with other women, you are indeed exemplary in all areas of marital life.
There is wisdom in submission, in showing subordination to existing arrangements whether humanly or divinely made.
2. Whatever apparent appeal it might have, total
independence is undesirable and unrealistic.
3. No one person on earth can do everything alone or claim to be a repository of all knowledge.
4. Just as we are all dependent on air, sun, food and water for life, so too we need other persons
and what they can do for us if we are to benefit from life and to enjoy it.
5. I am going to discuss this topic as it affects marriage relationships.
6. Marriage is another relationship that calls for submission to a head apart from that of legally and constitutionally ordained or appointed offices
or arrangements.
7. The condition under which Peter the Apostle
wanted women to be in subjection to their own husbands in his day, to me is very unfavourable in all Its ramification.
8. He did not take notice of the fact that there could be very stubborn husbands who may not have any regard for God and his word forever and ever.
9. Now, when a husband does not accept the principles of God’s word even as it relates to marriage, he may make life very difficult for the wife who is a believer of God’s word believing harsh and unreasonable in dealing with his wife.
10. Sometimes, he may place a blanket ban on her not to worship her God according to her conviction. All these negative behaviours of the unbelieving husband does not remove his headship over the woman.
11. What will be the attitude of a wife where the desires of her husband run contrary to her beliefs especially in dressing and other social activities?
12. hear the word of your messenger in this present time concerning all these burning issues
13. A woman who is convinced that she is a child
of God should conscientiously seek to conduct herself in a manner revealing her appreciation a be fact that her whole life course comes under the unseeing and unnoticeable view of Almighty
God at all times.
14. She must work hard not to use her mouth or tongue for slander, gossip or hurt but rather to build up and encourage others.
15. Moderation in food and drinks are certainly in
order. .
16. As a wife and mother, she must be exemplary in her love, doing her best to make her husband feel at home by providing nourishing food for the family at the right time and by creating a peaceful and conducive environment for the husband’s relaxation after the day’s activities.
17. She must put the family’s interest above her personal interests, making sure that her husband does not find admissible evidence that his wife is seriously neglecting her duties.
18. Cause your husband to notice at a glance that when compared with other women, you are indeed exemplary in all areas of marital life.
CHAPTER 4
It must take the messenger of God in your day to tell you what God approves for you from time to time as we journey along.
BALANCED VIEW OF A WOMAN’S ADORNMENT
It has come to my notice that as a result of the message of Grace, a lot of women in our midst do not know what constitutes proper. and improper dressing in the faith; what constitutes proper and improper modelling of their hair styles, hence some now desire to wear wigs while some put attachments.
2. Ministers on their side are equally confused about the whole thing, hence many input undue righteousness to all’ these physical and useless things thereby neglecting the weightier matters of the faith of Christ.
3. It has therefore become very important to place the adornment of wives in its right perspective in the fear of God.
4. First, I want you to believe that we are living in a system with changing fashions and circumstances. If it is not so, we should be living in the glare of the primitive era but we are not because we have advanced from there and are still advancing.
5. If all new inventions we are enjoying today were put in place in the days of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob or Jesus Christ, Peter, Paul etc, they would have made use of them.
6. Remember also that worship is a spiritual affair and not a sensual affair.
7. It is true that God does not change but His demands changes from age to age and varies from one individual to another.
8. It must take the messenger of God in your day to tell you what God approves for you from time to time as we journey along.
9. God approved different things for the people of Israel at different times as they journeyed from Egypt to Canaan. What He forbade His people from doing in a certain place, He later allowed them to do at another place and yet remained the same God.
10. Note: that something is good, it is because God says it is good and vice versa and no other reason should be adduced. Therefore a woman’s mode of dressing is very important.
11. In the first century, women spent much time and effort in building their long hair into elaborate, attention getting designs.
12. Additionally, they adorned themselves with expensive materials that time and an abundance of gold chains, bracelets, rings etc, in fact the wealth of a woman was measured by the amount of gold ornaments she possessed and costly apparels she had.
13. This expensive way of life among women
originated in the East and extended to the whole of Asia Minor.
14. During that time women took a lot of time and effort to beautify themselves so that they could look attractive, but the first century preachers, like Peter and Paul, considered this inappropriate as it would suggest that their main aim in life was their physical or outward beauty rather than seeking to be pleasing to God.
15. They were instructed to avoid bringing that type of ostentatious lifestyle into the house of God while coming to worship God so that people could pay strict attention to worshipping God rather than being attracted by the adornment of the women.
16. Another reason was to avoid competition in dressing amongst women in the fellowship.
17. Note that the Apostles never forbade the use of those things by women but rather tried to deemphasize on the attention women gave to those things as if the beauty of women were dependent on their outward show of adornment instead of good charisma which is within and reflects in their daily behaviours.
18. Today every woman that professes goodliness must know that women who live mainly for show of their hair styles or fashion are often victims of pride, envy, status seeking, haughtiness, arrogance, stubbornness, etc which rob both the mind and the heart of a spirit of calmness, peace and produce frustration and irritability.
19. However, this does not mean that a wife or women should give little or no attention to their outward appearance.
20. A woman does well to watch that she does not present an unwelcome appearance to her husband by being careless about her dressing, grooming of her face and physical appearance. The woman should know that she is the glory of the husband
21. A lazy and unkempt woman can never be a
glory to any sensible man or a credit to the man.
She degrades her husband’s appearance in the
eyes of others and dampens his morale.
22. If the husband delights in standing out before others, his lazy and unkempt wife can be a big irritation to him,
23. A woman’s mode of dressing from head to toe indicates that she has a good judgement in choosing what is modest for every occasion,.
decent and proper for her husband so that she will not let him down.
24. This can only be spiritually observed by a virtuous woman.
25. As regards your hair, I make a rule here for all of you that have very hard hair, to use whatever lotion, cream or chemical you know that can be helpful to you to soften it so that you can pack it with ease.
26. To those who have no hair or whose hairs are falling very disgracefully, wear a light wig that is moderate. If attachment suits your hair, put it on moderately.
27. The use of weavon is strongly prohibited.
28. If your hair is uneven, trim it but do not shave it.
29. Concerning your dresses, sew your dresses as women with right judgement about what is pleasing to God and your husband.
30. Long skirts, long gowns are still approved without unnecessary openings.
31. The use of ornaments of all sorts is strongly prohibited.
32. Use head bands that you know will suit your dressing, the colours notwithstanding.
33. Use your headgears for ceremonial occasions if you want but not as an act of worship to God. 34. Remember what you are and what you are made up of. You are a daughter of God and your whole life should reflect the life of Christ.
35. Do not sew your dresses in outlandish styles like the heathens who do not know God.
36. Let your moderation be seen by all men as people that have the fear of God in their hearts and as people that respect and honour their husbands according to God’s injunctions.
CHAPTER 5
MANAGEMENT OF CRISIS
A dedicated marriage will never break up… Unity of worship, unity of devotion and unity of sacrifice will do more than anything else to make your marriage durable… Pray together, plan together, conceal nothing that will affect the family from each other, go to fellowship together, take your bath together and if possible, dance together even in the home.
Two persons of different backgrounds and upbringing, sometimes of different tribes, nationalities and language, are bound to have disagreements or misunderstandings from time to time. It will be unrealistic to expect otherwise.
2. These marriage never be quarrels.
3. Marriage is an association and once there is an association of human beings, conflict is inevitable from time to time.
4. These occasional developments do not signify the breakup of the marriage if the couples are sincere and true children of God that really have respect for God.
are parts of the adjustments that entails. These disagreements should allowed to develop into long drawn-out
5. A dedicated marriage will never break up. When husband and wife gladly and truthfully put God first in everything and look up to Him for direction and guidance in all their affairs, they will be blessed with peace, harmony and contentment that will be the envy of their friends and neighbours.
6. Unity of worship, unity of devotion and unity of sacrifice will do more than anything else to make your marriage durable.
7. Therefore, if you want your marriage to endure till the end with peace and contentment, share your opinions together in a friendly way.
8. Pray together, plan together, conceal nothing that will affect the family from each other, go to fellowship together. take your bath together, eat together and if possible dance together even in the home.
9. Delight yourselves in what interests each other and avoid finding faults.
10. Never let love die out of your marriage by developing suspicious spirit towards each other.
11. Nothing destroys the home and creates disaffection in marriage more than suspicion. It is a dreaded disease that should be avoided in many marital relationships if the marriage must subsist.
12. So try as much as you can to keep the love in your marriage aflame. It is a joint responsibility. Keep it alive at all times. Whatever may have been said or done, keep it unfailing and in no little time, it will cover every shortcoming or pitfalls.
13. The hurts will be healed; the mistakes will be forgotten the impatience. and unfaithfulness will be forgiven.
14. You must try to encircle the vital unity in your family therefore with the protective walls of jealousy and love, loving words, loving deeds, mutual thoughtfulness, mutual tolerance, mutual forgiveness and above all with the determination to stick together always come what may.
15. There is no friendship in marriage. Your enemy will not destabilize your marriage but your friend will.
16. So you must remember that marriage is a living organism that has no spare parts. Any part of it that is broken down cannot be repaired but can only be managed.
17. Marriage is enjoyed and not endured. Any marriage that is endured has broken down if the couples are sincere.
18. Remember that Christ can only reflect to the world through families. The beauty of God is made visible through families. Therefore preserve your marriage at all cost.
19. Nothing will contribute more to preserving the unity in the home more than keeping private where they belong. That is where they should be kept. They are nobody else’s business. Not even of close relatives or friends.
20. Every family, if it is to last in peace and harmony, must have a sacred citadel of exclusiveness, where no prying eyes or gossiping tongues are permitted. 21. Remember that if your marriage breaks up, your reputation as a husband or wife is dragged to the mud. Nobody can substitute for your husband or wife if you are sincere in your marriage.
22. Crisis is a part of marital life. Crises vary but in all, the remedy lies in developing the spirit of dialogue. Do not harbour grudges against each other and do not die in silence.
23. If you do not speak out nobody will hear you; not even a prophet. Do not assume that your husband or wife should know or else you will be making a big mistake. What if he or she does not know?
24. Dialogue is very essential in marital life. It is better to ‘jaw jaw’ than to ‘war war’. Do not make trouble but dialogue.
25. One essential ingredient in effective dialogue is that each party should be attentive and quiet while one is making his or her points.
26. Avoid cross-questioning or cross-examination of facts while one is talking. Wait for your turn. Do not interrupt each other while talking and use soft
27. Do not deviate from the subject matter and avoid dwelling on the irrelevant. Do not bring too many matters at a time. Do not use words that are offensive to each other especially to your husband. Be happy that he accepts to give you audience because there are many who do not accept.
28. Do not use derogatory or debasing words to describe your husband or wife’s actions. Simply explain how you feel in a plain language.
29. The important thing is for either party to see how much his or her action upsets you and not to make trouble with each other.
30. Dialogue is aimed at resolving crisis and not to aggravate crisis. After you have made your points known, please, stop there and hold your peace.
CHAPTER 6
ADVICE TO WOMAN
While making your points to your husband, do not be hostile or threaten hell or else you will nullify your points and cause a stalemate.
2. Remember, you cause your husband to walk out on you while making your presentation with hostility and threats; he automatically pulls back to himself and takes his decision against you within himself and that may be very disastrous to you.
3. If you notice that your husband has a lover outside, for example, be friendly while talking to him on the matter.
4. Simply tell him how you feel about it and the dangers inherent in his action and hold your peace.
5. Do not ever try to begin to make troubles with him or else you will worsen the matter. Do not even try to threaten him with divorce because you may not know whether he had already concluded plans even with his people to humiliate you out of his house and you now facilitate it with your boastful and empty threats.
6. Do not forget the fact that your husband is a man and has absolute authority to determine his fate in his marriage.
7. He brought you into his house for a very big price which you never helped him to pay and so you are not a mere gift to him but his own purchased property with his hard earned money.
8. If you trouble him so much, he may .. formalize the love affair by marrying the person in question and you will never contest it with triumph in any law court, ~e it customary or otherwise ..
9. Then you will no longer be struggling with him or his second wife anymore. He may even build or hire a house and place her there and before your very eyes, he moves there with her. Who then will you blame? It is your wrong approach that has caused you the trouble.
10. Do not lose sight of the fact that your husband can send you away from his house anytime and even without a cause and also refuse discussions from friends, in-laws and relatives.
CHAPTER 7
ADVICE TO MEN
Everyman has the right to demonstration but nobody has the right to violence. Do not harbour grudges against your wife because by so doing you will be wounding your mind.
The man I say, remember that it is an act of violence to put away your wife for no just cause. It is sinful in the sight of God because violence is sin.
2. Every man has the right to demonstration but nobody has the right to violence. Do not harbour grudges against your wife because by so doing, you will be wounding your mind.
3. This accumulated grudges may even cause you psychosomatic pains, which will pose a serious threat to your life. This is the type of severe pains that aim at strangulating a man by impairing the blood flow to many parts of the body.
4. No matter the level of investigations doctors may carry out, they will not discover it. It has no therapy. Sometimes, they think it is pneumonia and the patient dies away.
5. So please, in any situation, apply dialogue and ease out your tension and you will save yourself and your family many troubles.
CHAPTER 8
HUMAN ASSOCIATION AND NOT MARRIAGE
Before I conclude this brief expository, I wish to make it plain that the conditions that necessitated any marriage will determine the life span of the marriage.
2. A lot of marriages were contracted in error, without truth and without God. Whatever induced either party to decide to live together as husband and wife, once that thing is exhausted, the marriage is finished, be it money or wealth, beauty, social status, influential position etc.
3. Marriage should be seen as a life contract of Divine Love and Truth and not a mere social interaction between a man and a woman. Some of the human associations we call marriages are not marriages in the right sense of it and also in the sight of God; and all of them are having unsolvable problems.
4. For example: any marriage contracted due to deceit or falsehood by either partner or imposed conditions like pregnancy before marriage during friendship is no marriage. To begin with, marriage was never the desideratum before they entered into friendship. The love must be one sided and this must create a lingering problem.
5. Induced marriage by the parents of the lady is no marriage. Often times, some parents may love a family and will like to have members of that family as their in-laws and vice versa. If the lady that is approached for marriage does not love the man, his family background notwithstanding, the marriage should not even be discussed let alone being contracted. If it is done, it is no marriage at all. The problem can never be solved for life.
6. Marriage contracted in infancy is no marriage to begin with. In every marriage, the lady must be of age enough to give her consent without duress so that she will never regret or blame anybody for anything she meets in her marriage.
7. Marriage contracted due to sympathy for either partner is no marriage. Whether either partner is an orphan or has suffered so much in life and you now wish to be a relief to him or her is rubbish.
8. Marriage contracted due to influence of the wealth of the lady or the man or his or her parents is no marriage. Any man that marries a lady because of her wealth or that of her parents must be prepared to bear with her insults and abuses whether he likes it or not. This is also applicable to a woman.
9. Family background is another important factor. Anybody that marries from a bad family lineage must regret his or her marriage. Where it is noticeable that the man is a lover of trouble and very stubborn even without the fear of God nor respect for persons and his wife marches him with fire for fire; any man that makes the mistake of picking their daughter for a wife or their son for a husband is in for an everlasting trouble. Can a bad tree bring forth a good fruit? Therefore a godly fellow cannot come from a bad lineage.
10. Marriage contracted due to beauty or one’s profession is no marriage. This is so because once beauty fades away with time, as it must, the marriage is over. At the same time, once the partner loses his job, the marriage is gone. Marriage must be contracted based on divine Love and Truth or never.
CHAPTER 9
POLYGAMY ASPIRANTS
Our fathers married many wives because of their levels of exposure and because they were peasant farmers … Today, we have drifted very far away from them.
To most of those that desire to be polygamists I say be careful that you do not mount undue pressure to your family and die prematurely.
2. Our fathers married many wives because of their levels of exposure and because they were peasant farmers. They needed many wives and many children that will help them to cultivate large expanse of land.
3. The wealth of a man that time was measured by how many wives he married and how many children he had.
4. Secondly; by how many barns of yam, how many flocks of cattle, sheep, goat etc hence some of them even bought some slaves to complement the efforts of their families.
5. Today, we have drifted very far away from them. Academic education or scientific technology was not in their programmes. The highest technology they had was goldsmithing, blacksmithing and welding.
6. Whoever limits the training of his children to that of our forefathers has succeeded in placing them even below poverty level. Poverty can never be eradicated from that family forever.
7. So, a man must of necessity make sure that he trains his children academically and otherwise so that they can be in a position to meet with the challenges of the developing world we are living in.
8. Therefore, any man who does not have the wherewithal to meet all these conditions and raise his children above poverty level should not dream or desire a second wife unless conditions compel him to do so.
9. The greatest legacy a man should bequeath to his children is not a fabulous bank account but a well-tailored and up-to-date academic education.
10. We are in the world of academics and it is an expensive and rewarding investment with lasting values. .
11. While thinking of raising children, also plan ahead on how to raise them above poverty level or else you have not completed your job.
CHAPTER 10
CONDITIONS FOR POLYGAMY
Let no man ever think of becoming ~ polygamist for the purpose of satisfying the desires of the flesh or to humiliate his wife because he thinks he is in authority.
A man can only think of marrying a second wife based on the following conditions:
2. Barrenness: If barrenness is concluded in
a family owing to some health defects that cannot be remedied, both parties should first of all decide whether to adopt babies or to allow the healthy partner, if any, to pick another wife in the case of a man or permit the woman to make her choice of a reasonable fellow that may agree to give her a baby. Either can bring a relief to the family if it is discussed and consented to by both parties in good faith.
3. A troublesome wife: Where a man is married to a troublesome wife and he does not want to put her away, he is free to marry another wife that will give him peace. There is nothing as precious as peace and nothing in this life can substitute it. A troublesome wife shortens the life span of the man.
4. Lack of Love: Where it is very clear that there is no more love lost between the man and his wife and, he is not ready to put her away, he should marry another wife that will love and cherish him.
5. In all cases, all these conditions must be made known to the Elders for proper investigation and scrutiny before they are implemented.
6. Let no man ever think of becoming a polygamist for the purpose of satisfying the desires of the flesh or to humiliate his wife because he thinks he is in authority.
7. God hates such authority.
CHAPTER 11
CONDITIONS FOR DIVORCE
Every true child of God should be very careful in handling the four major destroyers that put people in the grave prematurely: money, women, position … and land dispute.
The following are approved conditions by which a man can put away his wife and marry another wife:
2. A nagging wife who refuses to change.
3. A wife who is a gossiper, that goes about as a talebearer, inciting troubles here and there and refuses to change.
4. A wife who refuses her husband from bearing rule over her in all matters.
5. A wife who prefers to live with her parents rather than her husband and his relations.
6. A wife who refuses or neglects her duties by not loving and caring for her husband and children.
7. A dirty wife who is lazy and maintains a filthy environment and refuses to change.
8. A wife who disgraces and dishonours her husband in public continually.
9. A wife who threatens or attempts to take away the life of the husband in any form should not be allowed a day longer in. the house.
10. A wife who concealed information from her husband relating to any disease or chronic sickness she had been passing through before her marriage especially HIV, Sickle Cell and Tuberculosis.
11. A divorcee who had children in her first marriage and ran away and the bride price was not traditionally refunded to her first husband and concealed the information. This woman should be put away to save the man the trouble of being killed by the first husband.
12. Every true child of God should be very careful in handling the four major destroyers that put people in the grave prematurely: money, women, position either in the office or society, and land dispute
13. Develop Christ-like attitude towards them recognizing that you are aliens. and temporary residents here.
14. If you observe these rules and obey this message, which by revelation is preached to you for your comfort and relaxation in Christ, it shall be well with you. .
15. Encourage one another unto good works.
16. Love one another.
17. Cherish one another.
18. Respect one another.
19. Be humble and serve each other.
20. Avoid that which causes disaffection and disunity among the brethren.
21. Forgive one another as God has forgiven you.
22. Rejoice over the success of your brothers and sisters and God will give you your own success.
23. Pray for one another and wish your brethren all that you wish yourself.
24. Comfort and console the broken hearted.
25. Restore the backslider in the heart with encouraging words.
26. In all, maintain peace with everybody especially with the brethren in the same household of faith.
27. Finally, pray for me that the Almighty God will continue to use me as a channel of blessing to all mankind in this dispensation.
28. May the peace of God abide with the Bride forever.
29. Remain blessed in Him eternally.
CHAPTER 12
A GOOD SHEPHERD
As a messenger of God in this dispensation, I cannot because of the angry resentment: of the mixed multitude against the truth, shy away from the wholesome teaching from Almighty. God, which is accompanied by a great reward, for that will be a disservice to the Bride.
A good Shepherd is like a good father in the
family. He must be gentle, humble, meek, lowly, industrious, humane, tender-hearted, and loving to his flock.
2. He must aim at laying a good example to his flock. He must be ready at all times to feed and look after the flock with tender care.
3. He stays very close to the flock in so much that he can call them by their names and also to identify their daily problems with a view to providing the required remedies.
4. He lays down his life for his flock and defends his flock against any predators.
5. He places the welfares of his flock above his personal interests like a good father does to his family. .
6. He develops a very strong courage to accommodate the different behaviours of his flock. He is not easily irritated or provoked by the shortcomings of his flock.
7. He opens his house to hospitality hence his house is the place of refuge for his flock. He does nothing to his flock with impure motive or
parochial interests. He is always fair and firm in all his decisions.
8. He does no hurt to his flock but rather corrects and reprimands them for their own good. He aims at raising the best breed of flock that will attract the envy of the world.
9. He is always cheerful and never aggressive to his flock. He must be sober always.
10. His wife must reflect his character so that she can command respect among the flock.
11. She must aim at complementing the efforts of her husband in raising the flock.
12. She must appreciate her husband’s responsibilities towards the flock and not to constitute a clog on the wheels of progress.
13. She must be neat always and treat all the flock with fairness without discrimination.
14. She must develop enough charisma to accommodate the inadequacies and imperfections of the flock at all times because not all will appreciate her kind gesture.
15. She must be tender hearted.
16. The Shepherd’s children must be well behaved, obedient, humble, gentle and easily entreated.
17. They must not be proud, haughty, stubborn and reckless. They must not be drunkards who despise authorities.
18. They must dress modestly and aim at showing a good example to other children. They must be diligent, articulate and calculative in their behaviours so that foolish people will not use them to experiment their foolishness.
19. The duty of the flock is to co-operate and encourage the Shepherd so that he will do his work with joy.
20. If the Shepherd is happy, the flock must be happy also and vice versa. The best in the
Shepherd can only come out when he is in the right frame of mind.
21. To provoke the Shepherd to anger is an abominable crime with great consequences and should be avoided.
22. If the shepherd withholds the food, the flock must be exterminated.
23. Another duty of the flock is to work toward alleviating the burdens of pressure and stress that often weighs the Shepherd down financially, materially, domestically and otherwise.
24. If this is done, the Shepherd will be in better
Position to give in his best to the spiritual, physical, moral, psychological, material, educational, and healthy needs of the flock.
25. This is always the point where the bountiful
blessings of God are unfolded to the flock because they recognize and appreciate the labour of their Shepherd.
26. lastly, is to pray for him that God will continue to protect him from the hands of his enemies to give him an entrance into your hearts.
27. I have avoided this expensive knowledge with great reward from you all these years because of many disgruntled ones among the flock who give undue interpretations to every honest message with godly intention.
28. Such people bias the minds of others against the truth, and hinder them from being beneficiaries of God’s abundant blessings.
29. There is virtue in thanksgiving. There is virtue in appreciating a good thing.
30. Do not think that the Son of Man has started begging alms from you. This truth is not being
made known to you for the sake of the Son of Man at all.
31. I must remain guilty until I have made the
truth known to you. Our early fathers were convinced that nobody ever gave a cup of water or received a Prophet of God by revelation of what he is ever goes un-rewarded.
32. The early Apostles emphasized on the need for their followers to support the course of those that brought to them the gospel of Christ because it had a great reward.
33. Jesus Christ also drew the attention of his followers on the need to be appreciative of good things.
34. As a messenger of God in this dispensation, I
cannot because of the angry resentment of the mixed multitude against the truth, shy away from this wholesome teaching from Almighty God! which is accompanied by a great reward: for that will be a disservice to the Bride.
35. Remain Blessed.
SECTION TWO
BRIDGE TO PEACE
VOL. 2
BY THE SON OF MAN
APOSTLE PETER ODOEMENA
ON 29TH MAY, 2005 AT ONITSHA
CHAPTER 1
THE GENESIS
It is the woman that will always strain herself even beyond her nature to agree with her husband at all times and in all matters and not the man because, the man always takes the lead and the wife follows.
It is a regular occurrence among women to say obnoxious things like; “Your problem is that you do not agree at all. You can never agree even if you are wrong. You can never, never agree even till you die.
3. You are a king no man should talk to. You are master know-all.
4. Any small thing you begin to shout and shout until the whole neighbourhood will hear you and yet you say you are a man of God.
5. When it comes to women all the Minister’s eyes are red and hot but sisters are better than most of them in behaviour.
6. Small thing they will be hitting on sisters while they themselves live like beasts”.
7. These and many more are some of the painful remarks and aspersions women cast on their husbands each time they felt hurt by the reactions of their husbands over certain issues domestically and otherwise.
8. The great question is: why should a man that is called husband deserve all these derogatory and humiliating remarks from his wife?
9. The intelligent and reasonable answer is that the man refused to dance to the tune of his wife or refused to relinquish his God-given office to her.
10. To face facts in the fear of God, who should obey who: the man to obey the woman or the woman to obey the man? Who makes suggestions and who takes decisions or dictates how things should be in the home?
11. Note that not all issues that arise in the home require suggestions. Some require dictations, excluding the views and opinion of the wife if the purpose of the man must be achieved.
12. This is because sometimes,. negotiation and
suggestions on certain issues lead to lowering of
standard and set goals and can be painful in the end. The Head of State often uses ‘Veto Power’.
13. Any woman that feels unhappy each time her suggestion is dropped by her husband over an issue should know that of a truth she made no suggestion but a decision.
14. When a woman makes a suggestion to her husband and continues to stress on the importance or necessity of carrying out her so- called suggestion, it then implies that she wants to impress it on her husband as a decision and this is a visible sign of stubbornness.
15. This has caused bitterness and icy silence that lasts for hours and weeks in so many families.
16. Note very carefully that it is the duty of the
man to decide whether to take your suggestion or not, no matter how sound and plausible they may be.
17. Demonstrating against his refusal to accept or implement your suggestion is an act of stupidity and should be eschewed by all married women in this most holy faith if they want to get the best from their husbands.
18. Remember that you can call your husband whatever defamatory name you like to press home your displeasure over his decisions but you cannot change his God-given position as your Chairman and Managing Director in all your affairs as a wife.
19. It is the woman that should always strain herself even beyond her nature to agree with her husband at all times and in all matters and not the man because, the man always takes the lead and his wife follows.
20. Do you aim at leading or following your husband, judging from all your actions and utterances towards your husband?
21. Every married woman must answer this
question. Ignoring this question is a criminal act in the sight of God. Who is the superior authority in the home, you or your husband?
22. If your husband is, should a messenger query or reprimand a Chairman and Managing Director that employed him? He can only do that when he is tired of his job or position and desires dismissal from his service.
23. That your husband condescends so low as to give you audience and discuss vital issues with you before embarking on them due to mutual love, interest and understanding, should not be misinterpreted to mean an act of cowardice on his part.
24. It is a mark of foolishness for any woman to think that her husband is afraid of her. No! He is
not and can never be. He only does not want to hurt your feelings because he loves you.
25. Some women find it very difficult to obey their husband’s words or instructions very quickly and quietly according to the doctrine of Christ and this is a very infectious disease that can contaminate even the children in the family.
26. This issue of obeying your husband’s instructions or words very reluctantly and sometimes whenever you want to, has always caused your husbands to lose their tempers and shout on you or the children.
27. In this regard, who should be blamed? There
should be no reasonable excuse for any disobedience.
28. Another deadly and provocative attitude of the woman is the habit of having something to say in all instructions from their husbands instead of obeying.
29. Any woman that is guilty of countering her
husband’s statements must also be guilty of
slighting him and such a woman is a hater of
peace. She is a known trouble-shooter. Nothing offends a man more than these ungodly attitudes.
30. These issues may seem or sound very trivial to some but I want you to know and believe with me that these are the small palmerworms and canker worms that eat down an oak tree.
31. Every sincere family in this faith must agree
with me that most of the noises and icy silence in our marital homes are the offshoot of these unbridled and hateful attitudes from the woman.
32. What will it profit you if after going through these Holy Spirit Revelations and you still remain
untouched and continue in your old ways of living? The answer is eternal separation from the presence of the Almighty God, the God of peace.
33. Another problem that calls for concern is on the area of taking care of the children at home.
Some mothers do not know the dangers of allowing their children to mix up freely with heathen children in the neighbourhood.
34. From such association, they learn to be very
evils that are impossible to get rid of from their systems.
35. This may be provocative to a man of decency who wants the best for his children especially where the wife refuses to co-operate with him in that regard.
36. Avoid that which can cause the sparks to fly off by doing that which is right and fitting at the right time and the God of peace will establish Hls peace in your heart and in your home. Amen.
CHAPTER 2
WHEN THE SPARKS FLY IN
YOUR MARITAL RELATIONSHIP
There can never be peace in any family where the wife finds it very difficult to obey her husband’s words quickly and quietly without grumbling and without challenging the man’s words or instruction with the pretext that she is asking him a question.
No husband or wife of sound mind enjoys marital conflict no matter how little it may seem but it is all too common in almost all the families.
2. Note that there can never be peace in conflict.
Typically, one spouse says something or acts in a
way that irritates or provokes the other to anger.
3. Voices are automatically raised and tempers
flare up, igniting an emotionally charged argument with caustic remarks on each other. Then the sparks begin to fly from both parties
uncontrollably.
4. Then comes icy silence or chilly moment with both mates stubbornly refusing to talk to each other. This frozen and arrogant relationship can last for days or weeks depending on the spiritual maturity of the individuals.
5. This condition creates an unhealthy atmosphere in the family with its attendant gloominess as can be noticed at a glance in the faces of all the children in that house.
6. This is the most favourable condition for the devil to set his destabilising and divisive work in motion and this must be avoided.
7. At this point, nothing good can be seen in either the husband or the wife any more. Memory is but a pang. Muscles are flexed while feelings are hot and hostile. This cannot engender peace but violence.
8. In time, the anger subsides together with the
angry resentment and apologies are exchanged if there is any element of godliness left in their hearts.
9. Sometimes the extremist in this unwholesome
behaviour, which is notably the, woman, may begin to sob or weep after realizing her stupidity but that will not serve as a restraint for a repeat occurrence at all.
10. Meanwhile, peace is restored at least until the next disagreement.
11. If peace is a temporary condition in the home, then it is not the abiding peace from God, which comes from implicit and absolute obedience to God’s words and injunctions to His children.
12. Any peace that is not enduring is an occasioned peace. Are you having an occasioned peace or an enduring peace in your home?
13. Occasioned peace is necessitated when the
husband surrenders his authority for a while to the wife and this is'””a naked sign that the wife is not ready to submit herself to God at all.
14. If you can only enjoy peace in your home
when you forfeit your position to your wife or when you yield your position to your wife or when you yield to her intimidatory glances and utterances so that your neighbours will not hear
your voices, let it be known to you that you are cementing unbelief in your home and at the same time digging your grave with your own hands.
15. Note that every woman aims at intimidating
her husband, mesmerizing him to a state of mental stupor so that he will merely be a passive
husband and a beast of burden in providing her needs.
16. Such women do not consider the physical, psychological, mental disposition and socio- economic challenges before their husbands on a daily basis at all.
17. Their self-ego very much infatuates their eyes and mind that they cannot consider any other thing than their egoistic tendencies. This person should rather be called a lady rather than a wife.
18. If peace can only come when your husband harassingly and embarrassingly subjected to dance to your tune, you are no longer a wife but a lady and should be avoided because ladies put
husbands into their graves prematurely.
19. A woman dances to the tune of her husband at all times and in all matters because it is God’s injunction. Behaving otherwise or assuming another stance is ungodly and hateful in the sight of God.
20. There can never be peace in any family where the wife finds it very difficult to .obev her husband’s words quickly and quietly without grumbling and without challenging the man’s words or instruction with the pretext that she is asking him a question.
21. Believe it if you can; peace is subject to total obedience to a superior authority. Any woman that wants to live in peace in her marital home must of necessity concede and acknowledge her husband’s superiority over her at all times and in all matters.
22. Nobody challenges or strives or demonstrates against a superior authority and gets away without reprisals from God and her husband.
23. Note that harsh speech may leave emotional scars that linger long after the dispute has ended. Arguing may lead to violence.
24. A wise woman should not read only the portion of the message Bridge to Peace that gives her sensual pleasures but should show very strict concern to that area of the message which makes for an enduring peace in the home and by so doing forestall possible sparks that may fly off in marital relationships.
25. Of course, because of human imperfections, problems in marriage are sometimes unavoidable.
26. Still, frequent and intense disputes should not be dismissed as normal. It is evidently clear that a pattern of quarrelling or disagreement increases the likelihood that a couple will eventually divorce.
27. Hence it is very important that you and your wife take this message Bridge to Peace very important for a sustainable peaceful marriage with great rewards.
CHAPTER 3
BREAKING THE ICE BY ASSESSING THE SITUATION WHEN THE SPARKS FLY
It is better to drop or shelve away an idea or a demand than to strain your relationship with your husband … Any woman that does not know how to calm her husband’s temper Is nothing but a girl friend and not a wife.
If your marriage relationship is plagued by arguments, hostilities, and unfriendliness from time to time, in other words, you merely enjoy occasional peace in your home, please, try to determine if there is a pattern to your dispute.
2. What happens when you and your husband disagree over a matter no matter how small or trivial that matter may be?
3. Does your relationship or discussion quickly veer off course and deteriorate into a volley of insults and wild spurious accusations? If so what can you do in this regard?
4. First, take an honest look at how you as an
individual might be contributing to the problem.
Are you easily provoked? Are you argumentative? Do you obey your husband quickly and quietly or reluctantly with grumbling and murmuring if you
are a woman?
5. Do you study your husband’s countenance
before making any request from him?
6. Do you add ‘please’, while requesting anything
especially money from your husband or do you ask for money or any favour as a right as a wife? Do you make your request as a want or as a necessity? Do you know when your husband is in financial problem? Do you make financial requests at such times? .
7. These questions have become very necessary because most of the problems that erode the
peace of the home emanate from the mode of
making requests.
8. No man feels happy over financial requests
especially when he is in a financial distress and
this is not a crime .but a virtue. A man plans ahead of time while a woman plans for today.
9. A wise woman must calm down her husband before presenting any request that involves money if she must succeed.
10. What would your spouse say about you in this regard as your own contribution to the dispute as a man?
11. It is very important for husband and wife to sit together and address this all-important question, because both of them may have different views of what it takes for one to be argumentative, arrogant in disposition, reluctance in obedience, stubborn in behaviour, snobbish in reaction, harsh and hostile in approach, etc.
12. For example, suppose your wife tends to be somewhat reserved while you are candid and highly intense when expressing yourself.
13. You might say, “When I was growing up/ that was the way everybody in my family communicated’: It is not argument at all.
14. Perhaps to you, it is not possible, though what you see as uninhibited straight talk is perceived by your wife as hurtful and combative arguing.
15. Simple understanding that you and your wife have different communication styles can help prevent misunderstandings.
16. For instance, suppose your wife says to you
”you never spend any time with me”. You may be inclined to get irritated and deny the charge with cold facts, ”I spent a whole day with you last week or month etc”: you might reply.
17. But if you really understood her, you might find out that your wife is not really asking more time with you instead she may be asking for more reassurances, telling you that she feels neglected and unloved.
18. You can see that lack of understanding of your different communication styles can cause havoc in your home if you are not careful.
19. A man can spend many hours in his place of
work or visitations to friends and well wishers or even with his girlfriends if any but may have little
or no time to stay with his wife and discuss some
vital and lovely issues that may strengthen the peace in the home.
20. Sometimes the man may be willing but the
wife may be repulsive and often times mar the
friendly discussion by presentation of barrages of
endless demands of the family and at the same
time stressing the need for immediate solution whether the means are there or not.
21. This attitude is very wrong and offensive. If
you want to maintain peaceful co-existence with your wife, spend at least five minutes a day to discuss matters of mutual interest.
22. There is no end to family demands, so do not use them to cause uneasy calm between you and your husband.
23. It is better to drop or shelve away an idea or a demand than to strain your relationship with your husband. Once your husband feels displeased by your behaviour towards him, your life is in danger.
24. So be careful at a” times that you do not ignorantly remove your protective jacket, for your husband is your protective jacket.
25. No man ever deliberately provokes his wife to anger but women are easily provoked by the
reactions of their husbands which may be harsh at times because that is the only language women can understand very easily.
26. A woman by nature does not understand and take serious any soft-spoken word and when the
man exercises authority by giving her the hard pill sharply, she gets offended, why?
27. If you hate shouting and hostile reaction of
your husband over matters, please, learn to carry’ out his instruction without delay and very
peacefully too.
28. Every man is always in a haste and that is
natural.
29. A man’s head is always laden with too much
loads and troubles as he journeys through the
road to survival and prominence. It will be foolhardy for his wife not to show appreciation for the man’s efforts.
30. Any woman that does not know how to calm
down her husband’s temper is nothing but a girl friend and not a wife.
31. Every wife is a part of the efforts of the
husband and should never add additional burden
to the man by making him feel restless through
her misguided and unwarranted utterances and
behaviour.
32. To be godly is to be obedient. To be obedient is to be peaceful. To be peaceful is to be successful and that leads to longevity.
CHAPTER 4
COPING WITH THE PROBLEM OF EXTENDED FAMILY RELATIONSHIP
Any woman that wants to enjoy her marriage must, of necessity, show a very deep interest in the affairs of her father and mother in-laws and as well love, cherish and accommodate the biological brothers and sisters of her husband irrespective of their differing idiosyncrasies.
A tree cannot make a forest and no man is an island. Marriage is always contracted by families and villages hence too many people are attracted each time marriage is contracted.
2. The number of people that are involved in your marriage will determine your level of responsibility towards them.
3. Notably, the prominent and active players among the extended families are your immediate
parents of both sides and your biological brothers and sisters.
4. These people are indispensable in your marriage if you must have peace. Whether they
belong to your faith or not, they form members of your family.
5. Any woman that wants to enjoy her marriage must, of necessity, show a very deep interest in the affairs of her father and mother in-laws and as well love, cherish and accommodate the biological brothers and sisters of her husband irrespective of their deferring idiosyncrasies.
6. She must esteem them more than her own
biological parents, brothers and sisters because
she has eternally transferred her citizenship to her husband’s family and now owes it as her civic responsibility to ensure a peaceful co-existence in order to enjoy her marriage without fear.
7. She must see whatever she does to this extended family relations as her responsibilities
whether they are appreciated or not. The sole aim is to achieve a peaceful and harmonious co- existence.
8. It is this attitude of the wife that the husband
reciprocates towards his in-laws as well. It is the
behaviour of the wife towards her husband and his relations that determines the way her husband will relate with her parents.
9. Any man who does not reciprocate the kind
gesture of his wife towards his in-laws is wicked and ungodly.
10. Any wife that is disobedient to her husband, disrespects and dishonours her husband’s relations or even resents their presence around her cannot expect her husband to love her people or even accommodate them.
11. Note that it is a very serious offence for a wife to insult the relations of her husband. Whoever that does that dishonours her husband and is paving a way for her divorce.
12. It is better to insult your husband than ~
people but do not insult your husband for both are wrong. Your husband will forgive you with time but his people will never forgive you forever.
13. No matter the way they bring their troubles, be it male or female, the husband and wife should be intelligent enough to understand their grievances and pacify them with good approaches.
14. Every wife must see her husband’s sisters’ who are married as visitors and must be prepared to serve them any time they come. Behaving otherwise means denying your responsibility towards them.
15. In the same manner, you are a visitor when
you visit them and they owe it as their duties to serve you. The man should serve his in-laws while the wife should serve the man’s relations materially.
16. Every married woman must know how to sit
down and discuss issues with her mother in-law in a friendly way.
17. By so doing, you cement a good relationship
and even use the opportunity to create awareness about your husband’s condition of things and the efforts both of you are making to survive.
18. This will stem down the tide of suspicion and
hostile feelings towards each other and thereby bringing about the much-needed peaceful co- existence.
19. This little exhortation has become very necessary because a lot of women do not know
how to relate with their extended families and this is also applicable to some men.
20. Some husbands even do not visit their in-laws or pay condolence visits to them when their loved ones die and this habit is a wicked act and must be stopped.
21. There should be a change of mind and attitude here please. Your in-laws are a part of your family and should not be treated with contempt and contumely.
22. It is this ignorance on the right approach to
extended family relationship that often times, give room to conspiracy against either the man or the wife by their relations with its attendant evil effects.
23. Therefore, to avoid conspiracy, evil remarks
and unfriendly attitude from your extended family relation, please, learn to close ranks with them.
24. Remember that you are to take the lead
because you know better as a child of God
whether man or woman.
25. When you do this, they will lavish their love on you and talk good of you. They are heathens and only delight themselves in foods, drinks, gifts of money and materials, period!
26. Make these sacrifices if you can and you will not regret it. No price is too much to pay to have a peaceful and quiet marital home.
27. Keep aside whatever may’ be your status
socially and otherwise and take the steps of Christ in humility, who left His throne and became like unto us for the purpose of serving mankind.
28. The life of a child of God is a life of service.
CHAPTER 5
TOWN OR VILLAGE UNIONS AND WOMEN
ASSOCIATIONS AT HOME OR ABROAD
Every true child of God must make financial contributions to the development of his community whenever the need arises.
This is another issue of concern to all the children of God in this Bridal faith. . 2. Some do not know whether to register with such association or unions to avoid possible recriminations, like ostracising of non-members from the affairs of the women or men, either in the township or at home or not.
3. First, I want you to note that you are a human
being belonging to a village or town, whether you are a child of God or not and your wife as a
married woman is numbered among the womenfolk in your village or town irrespective of her faith or belief.
4. Secondly, determine the aims and objectives of such union or associations and make an honest comparative analysis with your belief.
5. If it is discovered that the aims of the union or
association are basically to be acquainted with
each other, to create a common ground whereby
members can benefit financially when they die or
when they organize one ceremony or the other, or when their parents or relations die, etc, please
steer clear from it because it is an association for
the dead and it is not meant for the living.
6. Note that often times, the heathens may tag
the union or association as either a development
or improvement or progressive one, but in reality, these things do not reflect, but the opposite.
7. It is also a fertile ground for the execution of
the ignorant and the unprincipled. The unlearned
and hooligans, who do not serve God nor His
interest, form the majority of their members.
8. These are violent men and women who use
such meetings as means of life insurance policy
against death and other unforeseen mishaps that
may befall them in life and to display their wealth.
9. Some say that it is through membership of
such associations that they can make meaningful
contributions to the development of their towns
and villages, but such people are liars.
10. Such people are there because of what the
association will do for them and not for what they will contribute to their communities through the association.
11. Communities normally levy their sons and
daughters for development projects, whether they belong to any association or not, because freedom of association is one of the inalienable rights of the individual.
12. Every true child of God must make financial
contributions to the development of his community whenever the need arises.
13. As to relationships, relate with them as your
people and do good to them as you have the
opportunity.
14. Pay condolence visit to them when the need
arises.
15. Attend family meetings with your kindred when you have the time, to discuss the affairs of your family or kindred and this is proper but be careful that you do not over expose yourself.
16. The greatest enemy you have is inside your
family whether man or woman.
17. The same is applicable to the woman. Relate with your womenfolk when you have the chance.
18. Participate in whatever they want to do as
womenfolk in your husband’s family, that can
move the family forward. In all, be very careful
that you do not over expose yourself.
19. Pay your levies and other contributions meant for development of your village or town as it pertains to women.
20. If you will observe and diligently obey these
inspired messages from God, you will maintain a
cordial and peaceful co-existence among all men.
Your conscience will be void of offence before God and before man.
21. Those that are on the opposing side will not have any recourse to blaspheme or speak evil of your faith in Christ.
22. Pay regular visits to your people at home. This will help you to see a lot of challenges that are set before you at home.
23. It will also help you to close ranks with your
people and still holding your ground based on your conviction of what manner of persons you are and what your mission is all about.
24. May the Almighty God, the Father of us all
grant you abundant revelation and insight into
these glorious messages that are designed by Him for our peace through Christ our Lord is my prayer.
25. Remain blessed in Him eternally.
SECTION THREE
MONITOR YOUR CHILDREN
WHEN THERE IS HOPE
BY
THE SON OF MAN
APOSTLE PETER ODOEMENA
ON 7TH AUGUST, 2005
AT THE HOUSEHOLD OF GOD, ONITSHA
CHAPTER 1
MONITOR YOUR CHILDREN
WHEN THERE Is HOPE
Children are a blessing from God. If we are not careful, if we do not understand the essence of God blessing us with children, what God intended to be a blessing to us can turn out to be a curse.
The problem of the society and the entire human race has been identified and it boils down to one thing: the inability of parents to espouse their children to God at their tender ages. The inability of parents to spare time and instruct their children on the right way of living so that their future can be guaranteed.
2. A lot of people here on earth lost bearing
because they were not properly guided. Any child that is not properly guided must lose his bearing and must be a disappointment to himself, to his parents and to the society.
3. There is no preacher that has ever appeared
here on earth and omitted children in his preaching. Not even Jesus, the Christ of his day.
He went as far as even encouraging adults using
children as example by saying, “except you make
yourselves like little children you will in no wise
enter the kingdom of God. Do not prevent these
little children from coming to me because the kingdom of God is made for such people”. So
children are also important.
4. Let me begin by saying what our fathers said,
”Marriage is honourable in all and is ordained of
God. “Note that children are a blessing from God.
But if we are not careful, if we do not understand the essence of God blessing us with children, what God intended to be a blessing to us can turn out to be a curse. Something God intended to make us feel happy can break our hearts.
5. The attention of everybody is required in this
all-important issue. We are human beings who move about freely. We interact with fellow human beings, and we have seen many families. In all these families, nothing causes heartbreak to parents more than their children. I repeat: nothing gladdens the hearts of parents more than their children, and nothing breaks the hearts of parents more than their children.
6. It is left for you as an adult to decide if what
you are reading is true or not. And any choice you make will determine whether you will give me your attention as an adult. But to little children, let me say few things.
7. A good child is a blessing to his parents. A
good child brings honour to his parents but a bad child brings dishonour and disgrace to his parents.
A bad child is a curse to his parents.
8. The day a bad child is born on earth is a
cursed day. God never created a man and said,
“this is a bad man” and created another one and said, “this is a good man, “No. To be good or bad is a matter of choice.
9. The choice you make right from childhood will determine what you will be in future.
10. God did not say any of you should be bad. He never created you to be bad, otherwise you will not be a blessing to your parents. As long as God created you, you are a blessing to your parents but you can be a curse depending on the choice you make.
11. This is a very serious matter. So many children today in our society have caused heart attack to their parents. When I say children, I mean all that are under the authority of their parents. Parents spend their fortune to train their children even to university level and in return, what do they get?
Broken hearts.
12. What do you think can prompt a child that is
born into a family to think of taking the life of his
mother or the life of his father for any reason at
all? What do you think will prompt a child that is
born into a family, who should be a blessing to his parents, to become an armed robber? What do you think can be the cause?
13. What do you think can cause a girl born into a family, who should bring honour to her parents, to become a prostitute? What do you think can cause it? Who will like to have such people as children? Is there any father who will like his children to become armed robbers? The answer is no.
14. But the truth of the matter is this: you do not want such children, but what efforts are you making to make sure you do not have such children? If you are not careful, that which you do not want is what will fill your home. How? By
neglecting your responsibility, by refusinq to do that which you ought to do, starting from the tender stage.
15. You see little children and think they are little. They are little in appearance but they are great in reasoning. They are very great in minds. Whatever they see and appreciate, register in their minds. It can never be erased.
16. We are in danger of losing our children. This is so because we are living in an age where our
children are exposed to very rough life styles at
tender ages. The society we are living in is very
rough, and very ungodly.
17. The situation we are in is such that if you do
not join others in training your children by exposing them to the hopeless educational system, which begins at pre-nursery level to the
nursery level, you will be considered the poorest
person on earth. But these things have their problems. Whatever that is good can have
disadvantages also.
18. Let us read what our fathers said, “It is
senseless to pay tuition to educate a rebel who
has no heart for truth” (Proverbs 17:16, Living
Bible).
19. It is useless and unprofitable to spend money paying school fees, to spend money training a useless, stubborn and rebellious child. It is a waste of time to educate and train a child you know is rebellious, stubborn, disobedient, arrogant, and is haughty.
20. In other words, training such a person means training your enemy and arming your enemy against yourself. That which you do not want is what you are using your money to import.
21. For that reason, I say, monitor your children
when there is hope.
SECTION FOUR
WHAT DOES MY FUTURE HOLD
FOR ME?
(A Sequel to Section Three)
BY
THE SON OF MAN
APOSTLE PETER ODOEMENA
ON 7TH AUGUST, 2005
AT THE HOUSEHOLD OF GOD, ONITSHA
CHAPTER 1
WHAT YOU DO TODAY DETERMINES WHAT YOU WILL BE TOMORROW
Whatever you want to be … tomorrow, will start today. If you want to be an armed robber, you will start today because the scripture says, “a child that steals his parents money is no less than a big robber.”
To the children, I shall briefly exhort you on this topic, “What Does My Future Hold?” Whatever you are doing today will determine what tomorrow will be for you.
2. Whatever you are doing today will determine what your future will be.
3. A child that is left to have his way or left on his own must surely bring disgrace to the parents. So, little child, take note. If you are stubborn, disobedient, and arrogant, it is not a good character.
4. If your character is bad and your parents are talking to you, God is telling you that what you are doing is bad and you don’t want to change.
5. Every day you add to your age. Every passing
year, you add to your age. The more the years pass by, the more you are hardening until hardening insensitivity will fully becloud you. If your parents like, let them flog you. It is too late to achieve anything in your life.
6. In other words, you have hardened beyond correction. What do you think will be your future
in that condition? Surely, your future is very bleak.
7. Firstly, you will die younger than you think.
Secondly, you will never find favour with any man and you will never find favour with God. Thirdly, that stubbornness in you will destroy you. That
stubbornness in you – your inability to change – will destroy you. You will never live long on the land.
8. That is why the scripture says, ”little children
obey your parents that you may live long in the
land which the Lord had allotted to you.”
9. If you do not obey the instruction of your parents, you will never live Ion on the land because a wicked man doesn’t have long on the land. If you are in school, your parents put you there because they want you to become someone reasonable in the future.
10. Foolishness is always in the heart of children. Our fathers identified it. But flogging, chastisement can drive away that foolishness! So you children, whatever you want to be will start from today.
11. If you want to be an armed robber, it will begin today because the scripture says, ”a child that steals his parents money is no less than a big robber.”
12. A child that steals his parents’ money and says it means nothing is no less than a big robber. If you are fond of stealing your mother’s money ranging from Five Naira, Ten Naira, or Twenty Naira to buy things like biscuits or any other thing; sometimes you refuse to eat in the morning, because you have stolen some money that you hope to use in school; you are a robber! I repeat: you are a robber!
13. You are acquiring the spirit of stealing. Stealing is a spirit. You acquire it. Nobody is born with that spirit. You acquire it through exposure.
14. Sometimes the parents are to be blamed. Who would like to be an armed robber? Surely nobody would like to be an armed robber and nobody would like to have an armed robber in his house as his child.
15. Then the question arises; all these armed robbers today who terrorize the whole of Nigeria
and the world at large, where do they come from? Do they come from the moon? They come from families. Don’t they have parents? Do you think that some of them didn’t go to school? Many of them are graduates. But they are what they are today because they missed this particular all- important matter.
16. I remember some years ago here in Nigeria,
there was an armed robber who was to be executed. He asked to have a word with his mother before his execution. He told her to come closer so he could whisper in her ears.
17. The mother was weeping and then went closer to the boy, leaning her ears towards the boy. The boy turned to her as if he was going to talk to the mother and bit off her ear before witnesses. It happened in Igbo land.
18. Pressmen gathered everywhere and people
were confused. They said, ”Ah! Young man why
are you so wicked to your mother;
19. He said, ”No. I am not wicked. I am dying
because of my mother. She refused to train me
seeing that I lost my father when I was too
tender. If she had trained me, if she had
instructed me in the way of God, I don’t think I
would become what I am now, and look at me
dying like that’; We learn from such things.
20. If you do not train your child and he turns out to be a hooligan, whom will you blame?
21. Little children listen to me. You are now in the nursery schools while some of you are in the primary level. Some are in the secondary and some are about gaining admission into the university.
22. I will begin with the nursery school. Ninety nine percent of the children in the nursery schools are from ungodly homes. Most of the children you see in the nursery schools are children that are just sent there by their parents because they have no maids or baby-sitters. They have nobody to look after them at home.
23. The parents simply drop their children there and go away. In the evening they go there and
pick them.
24. Nursery school can cause sorrow to so many
families if we are not careful. That is why you
must monitor on a daily basis, the activities of all
¥our children, starting from nursery school.
25. When are you going to do that? I don’t know if there is any other proper time than now. When they are on holidays, do you notice any strange
thing in them? Do you see them behave somehow? Or are you impressed by the way they behave?
26. Because there are some people that call evil
good and call good evil. There are some people that have no standards at all. They have no future for their children. They just have children; they have no plan for them. So, no matter the way their children behave they take it as normal.
27. A mother once came to me and was telling me about the behaviour of her grandchildren. The matter was taken to their mother. Their mother said, “Don’t trouble them. There is nothing wrong in what they are doing. That is what is obtainable
in the society today! Their case should not be different’~ And that is the much she knows.
28. Whatever the children might be tomorrow is not her” business. Even if they turn out to be hooligans, it doesn’t disturb her. Can we pattern
our lives after such a person?
29. I know of a man who lost five children in the hands of the police because they were armed robbers. I went to him, and I said, ”It is unfortunate that your children are just dying like this.
30. He said, “No! All I know is this: I came alone I am going alone. Anybody can do whatever he wants, and go away the way he wants. II
31. Then the question arises: was his aim in raising children just to raise them and hand them over to be killed? Was that his aim? You married your wife only to raise children that the police will kill overnight because of bad behaviour? See? That person is wicked.
32. To little children, I write again. Any child that steals the parent’s money and says it doesn’t matter is no less than a big robber. You are a criminal. If you are fond of stealing your parent’s money, no matter how small that money might be, you are acquiring a stealing spirit.
33. You will notice that no matter. what you eat in the house, you would still be restless until you steal some money. If you don’t steal money you will not go to school.
34. What do you do with the money? You either
buy biscuits, chewing gum or buy nonsense.
Sometimes you don’t eat those things: You give them out to your friends.
35. Sometimes your bad friends can push you into stealing, because there are some bad children in the school who will come to school with plenty of money to buy many things and be giving it out to their fellow friends just like that, and you will emulate them. .
36. This is because if you follow your friends to eat every day, one day, it will be your own turn to provide food. From then on, you start stealing money. You can hardly drop or stop it.
37. Let me point this out: a little child that starts stealing his parents’ money at a tender age can never complete his studies in the school. He must drop half way because he will prefer making money to reading. To him, going to school is a waste of time.
38. That is why you see many of them, who are in school, they are at the same time doing their merchandise, not to help themselves in the school but because they can never stay without money. It has been their habit.
39. Watch all such children, they don’t complete their studies. Before you know it, the money they have saved will influence them. They will say goodbye to education.
40. A child that steals his parents’ money and
thinks it doesn’t mean anything, is no less than a
hardened criminal no matter your age or class, whether in the nursery, primary, secondary, or in
the university level.
41. There are many ways you can steal your parents’ money. If you are telling lies so as to
extort money from your parents with the pretext
that you are buying textbooks or you are making
some contributions to the school and things like
that, just to extort money from them, you are a
hardened criminal. You are acquiring a spirit and when that spirit settles in you, it doesn’t go off again.
42. If you are a girl and you develop yourself with that spirit, you are in trouble. You will bring
disgrace to your husband. Before you know it, you will be stealing little things. When you marry, that will bring trouble to you. From time to time, you will be having problems with your husband over money because you acquired a dangerous spirit during your school age.
43. Why am I stressing this? The love of money is the root of all evil.
CHAPTER 2
DO NOT SPOIL YOUR FUTURE
A wise child encourages the parents to train him by making sure that nothing is wasted in the house because every waste in the house involves money … A child that steals the parents’ money is spoiling his future.
Little children, listen to me. A child that steals the parents’ money is telling the parents to stop training him. When you steal the money that is meant for your books or money that is meant for your feeding, you are frustrating your career.
2. A wise child encourages the parents to train him by making sure that nothing is wasted in the house because every waste in the house involves money. If you are wasting food, you are wasting money. Whatever you are wasting in the house, you are wasting money. That money could have been used even in training you.
3. So when you are stealing your parents’ money, you are making it impossible for them to support your education; to support you in any type of endeavour because you are frustrating them. A child that steals the parents’ money is spoiling his future.
4. Sometimes, our parents contribute greatly in
spoiling their children. Recognize that these kids
are exposed to very rough conditions in their schools and colleges where they are under ungodly influences of their colleagues and friends. Why should we fuel this particular evil by exposing them to danger in our homes?
5. Hear me very well. I am telling you this from the Throne of Grace. If you don’t want to raise both male and female criminals in your. house, please do not keep your money within the reach of your children.
6. Parents, please take note. If you are fond of keeping your money within the reach of your children, in no distant time, you will raise robbers in your house because money goes with temptation.
7. Any parent that is exposing his or her money to the children is exposing them to great temptation.
8. I don’t care how small that money might be.
Don’t say, “For convenience sake, I try to keep it on my table. My children don’t touch it’ Don’t worry, one day they will touch it. You may say, “I know my children, they can never touch it. Don’t worry, one day you will never know your children.
9. Remember, as long as your child is coming up, he is growing in wisdom and in knowledge of both good and evil because he is having contact with other people whom you do not know every day.
10. One day, you will begin to look for money in
your house starting from Five, Naira to Ten Naira; Ten Naira to Twenty Naira; Twenty Naira to Hundred Naira. By then it will be too late. Who caused it? You!
11. To little children, God is saying, if they love eating snacks, don’t give them money to buy snacks. Buy snacks for them. Don’t allow your children to hold money.
12. I know that parents consider little children as minors. They are not minors in things concerning money. How will you know when another spirit is trying to creep into your child? I will show you a
sign why you should monitor your child when there is hope.
13. At the early stage of his life, if somebody gives him money, he doesn’t know what money is all about. He may simply play with the money until an adult comes to take it away from the child’s hand.
14. A time comes when someone gives the child money, straight away he takes the money to the
mother or father and hands it over. This is another stage; he doesn’t know what to do with the money yet.
15. At the first stage he doesn’t know what money is all about. He thinks money is a fanciful paper but at this second stage, he has identified the money but he doesn’t know what to use the money for. He gives it to the mother or father.
16. At another stage, that is the third stage of identifying money and handling money. Watch that child, when people give him money he will just put it in his pocket or hide it in his school bag. The parents wouldn’t know about it.
17. Before you know it he will take the money to school to buy snacks, which he may not eat; he may give it out to friends, claiming it is his money, claiming, ”Brother gave it to me” or “Uncle gave it to me,” or “Daddy gave it to me” This is another stage.
18. Then at another stage and that is the most dangerous level, you will be there, you will know about the money. Money will be given to your child, before your very eyes, he will just take it as his own and tell you plainly it is his money. You will be arguing with him over the money.
19. So little children, if you don’t want to be a robber, if you don’t want to die young, if you don’t want your future to be spoiled, if you want your parents to help you become useful, avoid buying snacks in the school, avoid going to school with money because if you don’t go to school with money you will have nothing to spend. Don’t go to school with money.
20. To those in the secondary school that go to school by bus, only take your transport money and don’t ever be tempted to save your transport money for snacks so that you would trek. You are learning how to steal. If you want to trek to school or if you trek to school, when you come back, hand the money over to your parents. Tell them that you trekked or that somebody helped you. You will use that money the following day.
21. By so doing, you are encouraging your parents to train you. You are even restoring confidence in them that they are not using their money to train a stupid fellow, a hooligan, one that will bring shame and dishonour to them.
22. The Igbos say that a child that will be a perpetual debtor is known in his early life. Whoever gives birth to a hooligan and says he did not discover it early enough is telling lies.
23. Parents should discover early enough that they have produced a hooligan. Parents should discover early enough that they have produced a prostitute. It is noticed from the very beginning. When it breaks loose, it is no longer a surprise, if people would speak the truth.
24. Children, pause and ask: what does my future hold? The life I am living today, my character today, the person I associate with today, will he help me to be a responsible, reasonable person tomorrow? Will he help me to be a child that will gladden the hearts of his parents? Or will he make me become a source of sorrow and agony to my parents?
25. Will he help me to be a responsible child, useful to myself? Or will he lead me to my being a useless fellow?
CHAPTER 3
WHO IS YOUR FRIEND?
Find out who the person you keep company with is. What good thing do you learn from him? Whoever you befriend, there is a reason why you are friends. The person you go out with in school, who is he? Who is she?
Another stage is this: who is your friend? Who is your friend in the school? Why is he your friend? Why is she your friend?
2. Are people friends for nothing? Whoever you befriend, there is a reason why you are friends. The person you go out with in school, who is he? Who is she? Why are you compatible?
3. Will that thing that makes two of. you compatible help you become successful tomorrow?
Or is it what will make you useless or even ruin your future?
4. The friend one has in the school has something to do in the life of the person. There is a bad friend. The worst friend is a school friend in the primary, secondary or even the university levels.
5. A lot of evil character seen today is the product of friendship.
6. Women that went to school, especially those that were boarders in their time, don’t you know
what is happening in the dormitories where you lived and schooled? Some of you were among
such people. If God did not come to help you, you would have continued with that type of life. What would have been your future?
7. Would you allow your daughter to experience
what you passed through? Did you see any evil in the life you lived? Why did you indulge in such a life? Don’t say, ”It is the reigning fashion there.
Everybody is known for that. As such my case is not different”.
8. If we lose control of our children, who should we blame? We should blame ourselves.
9. Is there nothing God has given us with which
to control our children? The hope of the parents lies in their children. The consolation of parents lies in the children.
10. You that is a child, will you be a consolation to your parents or a source of agony and broken heart?
11. Who is your companion? Find out who the person you keep company with is. What good thing do you learn from him or her? Can you find out that the only thing for which you know this person is evil? Can one learn a good thing from somebody that does not know God? I do not know how that good will look like.
12. Children in schools listen to me. There is one with whom you enjoy whatever you buy with the money you steal at home. The person in turn to Germany or South Africa or any other place abroad.
22. It will take a dropout to go to Germany. No place is better than home. Only- hooligans venture abroad. What do they do there? There is nobody there that has a viable and visible occupation. Watch the calibre of people that go there: nonentities that have lost bearing in life.
23. They just go there to steal. They go there to kill. They go there to do drug pushing just to make money. Intelligent people don’t indulge in that nonsense. You can hardly hear of somebody going abroad to study now.
24. Before now, people go abroad to study. But now, nobody goes there to study. They just go there to make money and their parents are happy when they don’t know how they make the money. They sponsor death! I thank God they receive reports especially from South Africa, how they are killing themselves there.
25. When you don’t train your children very well, they are in danger of dropping out from schools;
they are in danger of even dropping out of their apprenticeship. A child that is not well trained can never complete his period of apprenticeship with any master. He can hardly be trained by any man in any business in life because he is a criminal.
26. The first step in training your children is by
reducing criminal tendencies in them because we
are living in a society that is highly criminally minded. Reduce the criminal tendencies in them!
27. It is the criminal tendencies that are in ladies that push them into prostitution. They turn to prostitution to make money. What they use the money for, I don’t know. They just want to buy very nice shoes, reigning fashions. That is all!
28. Help them to understand that there is nothing greater than virtue. That a virtuous child is a blessing to himself, to herself, to the society! A virtuous child commands respect, honour, integrity, and receives favour from men and God.
29. Train a child in the way he should go and when he grows up he will never depart from it.
CHAPTER 4
AWFUL IMPLICATIONS OF TELLING LIES
Now listen to me children. If you are a habitual liar …people will not trust: you … your parents will lose confidence in you … whatever you do, your parents will not defend you; whether you are right or wrong.
It is written, “a liar is a criminal: a habitual liar is a murderer. “Little children, listen to me. A liar is a criminal. A habitual liar is a murderer. How many will like to be criminals?
2. How many tell lies? If you know you tell lies continually, if you do something wrong, you will deny; you steal money, you will deny; whatever evil you do, you will deny. Why do you deny? It is because you know that what you did is not good and you know that you must be punished if you reveal yourself. For that reason, you begin to tell lies.
3. In other words, you are a criminal, you are acquiring criminal mind; criminal spirit. How many children would like to continue telling lies after reading this? Parents, monitor your children when there is hope.
4. If you are a liar, a habitual liar, first of all, people will not trust you. Secondly, your parents will (‘lose confidence in you. Thirdly, whatever you do, your parents will not defend you whether you are right or wrong.
5. When you are accused of anything, your parents can never come out to defend you because they don’t know when you are speaking
the truth and when you are telling them lies. Why? You are a habitual liar and a habitual liar is very unreliable.
6. If you are a very good child, if you do something wrong, you don’t need your parents to come to you. You report the thing to them. They will be happy. If you don’t report it they will punish you.
7. Tell them the truth why you did it. Nobody will kill you. You will only be warned. If you are a good child you will never try it again because your parents are not happy with it, God is not happy with it.
8. Little children, if you want to please God, please you parents. When you are pleasing your parents, you are pleasing God.
9. Without your parents you have no other creator. Nobody created you except your parents. You couldn’t have come to this world except through your parents. Nobody is taking care of you but your parents. So your parents remain the visible God you know.
10. How many believe this even among the adults? If you know any other person that created you other than your parents, you are a liar, for there is no other way you could have come into this would except through your parents. So they remain the number one creators whom your eyes can behold. Nobody took care of you up to this very moment except your parents.
11. What if your mother killed you in the labour room or at the backyard where you were born? Do you think you would have seen the light of day? That is why you must be grateful that you have parents that care for you.
12. So little children, do not place yourselves in a situation where your parents will deny you; where your parents will not defend you when there is trouble because you are a liar.
13. If you don’t tell your parents the truth, who then will you tell the truth? Is there anybody that loves you more than your parents? The answer is no. You see why you must tell your parents the truth on every matter at all times. Even if they flog you, it is for your own good.
14. It is written in the book of Hosea 7:8-9, “My people mingle with ungodly men and women,” and nobody makes friendship with a leper and refuses his handshake. That is why we keep on saying that evil association spoils good character.
15. I am telling you the truth in love. Monitor your children when there is hope. If you want your children to be godly and you notice some children who do not receive good training from their parents, who are not behaving well, separate your children from them. Let them call you whatever they like. Why? All that glitters is not gold.
16. There are some children that are not worthy even to sit on the same bench with your children. They are very, very bad.
17. When you see your child manifesting bad traits, do not close your mouth. Don’t say it is a way of life. It is not a way of life. You are making the child worst.
18. That is why, if there is a problem, we don’t know where to begin to handle it because sometimes, parents show unnecessary and ungodly love to their children. It is not good at all.
19. Do not arm your children against themselves.
20. A child that dishonours instruction, and refuse counsel, is arming himself against himself because whatever a man soweth, that he must reap.
21. What does my future hold? From the way I am behaving now, judging from the type of company I am keeping, what does my future hold for me?
22. To you parents, from the way you are assessing the performances of your children in every aspect of life, what do you think the future holds for them? Are you seeing something in your children that will make you bank your hope on them? Or are you seeing them manifesting some traits of ungodliness that tend to create some fears in you that you may be wasting your time?
23. What are you seeing in your children? Is it encouraging or discouraging? Monitor both your male and female children. It is a joint responsibility for both the father and mother.
CHAPTER 5
THE UNIVERSITY Is NOT MEANT FOR EVERY KIND OF CHARACTER
If you notice in your child some signs of stubbornness, lack of humility, insincerity and pride please, don’t sponsor him or her in any university because that child is over-expensive and you are sponsoring your child into a cult or into an American world which I call ‘Hollywood Gang.
To the youths who are still aspiring to be graduates; is what you see in them encouraging you to sponsor them? Are they humble enough? Are they obedient enough? Are they respectful enough? Have they manifested at least some elements of godliness that can make you courageous in backing them up in their university careers?
2. Or are you seeing signs in them .that this university may be the end of their lives; may be disastrous to the family? You have to watch the males, watch the females because in the university, you see a lot of characters there and whatever your child is in your presence will determine what he is going to be there.
3. If he is accustomed to keeping bad company, there he will perfect it because in the university, every kind of character is there.
4. What if you do not catch them young by creating enmity in their hearts against evil conduct and they get there? I wonder if you can even sponsor them because a bad child is the most expensive child in the world.
5. A bad child is the most expensive individual in
the world. You may not know what I am saying because your children are still too young. But I thank God who is still training them in their youth so that we can face the challenges of time.
6. Go to G.R.A.s and you will see big men that have money, that have raised adults, some of them have turned to be hooligans. Go and enquire from them how much they are spending on those children, just begging them to calm down their hooliganism to no avail.
7. When you go to the University, you will see many of them spending fourteen years, fifteen years without graduating. Their parents are tired of them. They don’t sponsor them anymore but they are there making money anyhow, making money by all means to sustain themselves there. They are not reading and they are not with their parents, and they will never graduate till the end of the world.
8. The University has expelled some but they are still there. These are the people that form secret societies, cults, and foment troubles in all the Universities.
9. Expelled students! After fourteen years, fifteen years, what caused it? Their parents didn’t give them proper upbringing. And with that reckless living, they secured admission into the university using the wealth of their parents.
10. You know there are many ways of securing admission into the universities. Sometimes, parents use money to get their children away from home, to see whether the university will help them refine such children, not knowing that they will go there to be worse.
11. So, I am saying that if we do not monitor our children that are aspiring to be in the universities
now, assess them very well and know whether they are worthy of our confidence, whether they have developed themselves to the point that they can never, never erode the confidence we repose on them; if we embark on them, after spending money on them, we will die of heartbreak.
12. We will die of heart attack because the amount expended on a child will determine the level of sorrow that will come to the parents if there is demise on the way.
13. That is why, if you notice in your child, male or female, some signs of stubbornness, lack of humility, insincerity and pride, if you notice this spirit in your child, please don’t sponsor him or her in any university.
14. One thing is sure: you cannot succeed in sponsoring the person because he is going to be over expensive. I say over expensive!
15. Secondly, you are sponsoring your child into a cult or into an American world, which I call ‘Hollywood Gang’ because when you get there, you will see ‘Texas Gang’, ‘Arizona Gang’, ‘Hollywood Gang’, or ‘Californian Gang’. They’re all there. You will see the ‘Hippies’ with their round caps and jeans, with their very dark eye goggles. If you see them nobody tells you that these are just film stars, American hippies, cow boys! To be a cowboy is not a good thing; to be a violent man is not a good thing.
16. Just see the ladies. Because you are going to a place where there is no uniform for your school; where you are permitted to come to class even naked, you can attend lectures naked; where you see ladies going there with brassiere alone. Some go with pants alone. You see the boys, oh, no! They are something that resembles human beings.
17. What if you have not killed that urge in you, won’t you be influenced wrongly to think that isa way of life? Why am I reminding you of this?
18. A child that is not well disciplined, highly organized with high morals, which can only be generated in him or her by the fear of God, must surely be influenced wrongly in the university. It is a place where nobody controls your activities.
19. It is another ‘Calacuta Republic’. Just behave
as you like. If you want to kill yourself, kill yourself because it is believed that only adults come there. It is a place made for adults only. So if as an adult, you want to be naked, fine! You want to be corrupted, fine! You want to read, fine. You don’t want to read, even better.
20. Have you obtained a habit, a culture that cannot be influenced away from you? From S.S.1
to university aspirants, have you acquired a habit, a culture that can never be broken, which is the essence of God teaching his children? .
21. What and what do you notice in your child and you know that pride has set in? If you are a man, did you just come up and become a man like that? If you are a man, whatever your son is today is what you passed through. Wherever your son is today, you were there some time ago. Where you are today, by God’s grace, your son will come there.
22. I was at the corridor one day, I saw an old man wearing his red cap. He was stooping low, leaning on his walking stick and I was counting his steps as he marched. I summoned my sons. I said, “Little children do you see this man?”one of them said the man is stooping. I said, “Yes. Very soon, that is how 1 will be walking. 1 will be like him”. He shouted “God forbid! Daddy, you can never be like that”: I said, “Whether you like it or not, very soon, I will be using walking stick, stooping and counting my steps”.
23. You know, infants do not believe that their parents can grow old. So keep on telling your children this truth. Tell them” the naked truth that a day is coming when you cannot run again, when you will be depending on them even for feeding.
24. Tell them this truth that a day is coming when you will depend hundred percent on them for feeding. That if they don’t bring food for you, you will die. That you won’t be making money again, you will be weak because old age has set in.
25. When you tell your children these facts of life, they will be looking forward to the future.
CHAPTER 6
PARENTAL IRRESPONSIBILITY
Maybe you do not know that due to ignorance, our parents took delight in our evil behaviours. They bragged about it … I am saying that our parents even sponsored our destruction ignorantly!
Now, this is what I am trying to point out. Watch your child. If he is a young man, any step he takes will tell you the spirit that is operating in him because, you as his parents passed through that stage. No matter how religious you were, nobody uses religion to cover it. It is only in the faith of Christ that God helps them by giving them sound teachings at an early stage.
2. As many as were too tender and their parents brought them into the faith of Christ, which we have, and God began a good work in them, they are happy! They are blessed.
3. Without this faith, they would have tasted all that we tasted. When you reach the stage of going to night parties, you must attend nightclubs. When you reach smoking stage, you must taste smoking. This is the truth. It is this faith that saves you from all these troubles.
4. Looking at the king’s mouth you won’t believe
that he was breast-fed. Why do we have to talk to our children this way? It is because we don’t want them to pass through the sorrows and agony we went through due to our parents’ stupidity and ignorance. ~
5. Our parents thought that all it took to raise children was to only give them food, buy clothes for them and that was all! Whatever their children will be in life, God will determine. We were left at the mercy of nature.
6. I thank God that we are still alive today with our senses correct. Some of our mates ran mad; some of our friends ran mad! Some died because of rough life!
7. Maybe you do not know that due to ignorance, our parents were taking delight in our evil behaviours. They were bragging with it.
8. While I was a smoker my father never discouraged me. He was smoking and I was smoking. He was buying cigarettes for me. He would drink; I would drink. I pitched tent with him, more especially when he quarrelled with my mother. I would always be on his side. We would pass cigarette together and we would say, “Leave the woman alone”. We would leave her alone. That was why my mother hated me and I hated her until this Faith was revealed.
9. I am stressing that our parents sponsored our destruction ignorantly. Some of our parents were even encouraging us to “go and impregnate women and bring them to the house instead of asking us to go to school or to learn one trade or the other. Some would even get us girlfriends, encouraging us to impregnate one telling us that they were there for us and that they would take care of us. This is to show you their level of exposure, and what they desired for us. Can we desire such for our children now?
10. Likewise some of the women were encouraged by their parents to become prostitutes, commanding them to go out and get- money from men. They would say, ”Don’t stay here to bother me every time. I want to buy this. I want to buy that. Why not go and collect money from men/ follow them and get money” And they would follow them. Imagine such training!
11. What I am pointing out is this: do not lavish your money, or spend money on the education of a rebellious child. If you see your child full of himself or herself, don’t ever sponsor that person into the University ground because if he gets there, surely, birds of the same feather must flock together and he is gone.
12. How do you know a child that is not worthy to go to the University? Here is how: the pride in him or her would not allow him or her to recognize authority.
13. Authority must first be recognized before it is respected, and the first authority one must recognize is the authority of one’s parents.
14. If you don’t recognize the authority of your parents over you, you will never respect them because every authority calls for respect. Charity begins at home.
15. If you don’t honour and respect your parents’ authority, you can never honour, respect or recognize the authority of any other person and
you are not worthy to go beyond where you are now.
16. A useless fellow is the most expensive fellow in the world, and a bad child is very expensive. You know very well that this is true, and nobody can afford to train such a person.
17. If you have your daughter and she is full of herself, you will know. After all, you passed through that stage. Is there any trick she plays of which you cannot catch her?
18. There are many ways your female child can tell you that she is of age even without opening her mouth. Give her instructions on what to do, and she would look at you and turn her eyes away. If she will obey you, it will be at her own convenience and not because you said it, but because she wants to. She is telling you that she is of age.
19. At that stage, if you send her out for anything, she would like to stay back and look at herself in the mirror and beautify herself before going out because she feels that somebody is watching her.
20. If it starts from your home, don’t train that person. She will put you into trouble. The best thing you can do for that person is to command
her to marry so that you can have rest.
21. Listen to me very well. A child that is not worthy of the parents’ confidence is not worthy of training.
22. Can any parent afford to train somebody that they know will disappoint them? You know that the person is showing signs of disappointment and you still invest your money on that person. Are you not a fool? Why not use that money to buy a goat? It is better! Because from all indications, it appears that the best way to spoil our children is by sending them to school. But they must go to school. They must.
23. I believe that it is only an idiot that would like to be influenced out of the way of truth. It is a fool, he that lacks understanding, he that has no future that would easily be influenced out of the way of truth.
24. A wise child that aims at having a future; a child that has understanding, would always appreciate the parents’ efforts in helping him or her become something useful and would never be a disappointment to the parents. After all, parents train children for their own good, and not for the parents’ own good.
25. The school holiday period comes with several holiday programmes coupled with their accompanying evils. During these holiday periods, many young ones take excuses to attend such programmes.
26. Before you know it, from holiday programmes or lessons to too many unwanted pregnancies. Before you know it, death signs will begin to ring bells everywhere. Sorrows will fill the hearts of parents but wise and intelligent ones will use the period of holiday to look into their life activities; to look into their studies and do some necessary corrections.
27. Those that have already passed out from the secondary schools should use the period of holiday to prepare themselves for admission into universities. For once somebody is busy on something that is useful, foolishness runs away from such a person. This is so because an idle mind is the devil’s workshop.
28. Your preoccupation in your mind will determine your attitude to life. I mean your life ambition determines your attitude to life. What you want to accomplish in life must surely determine what your behaviour would be.
29. There are some people that have no life ambition at all. They just accept whatever comes their way. While there are some that have lofty ambitions to accomplish, and they are looking unto God everyday for the fulfilment of their life’s ambition.
30. A wise man doesn’t rest until his ambition in life is accomplished. That is What it means to live a fulfilled life. When you fulfil your life’s ambition you have lived a fulfilled life.
31. But if your life’s ambition is not fulfilled because of your stupidity and recklessness, you have made a shipwreck. You have no one to blame but yourself. When you fulfil your life’s ambition, you brighten your future.
32. The same thing applies to business boys. When they are apprentices, they did very well. When they finished the period of their apprenticeship; they were blessed by their masters. They took off very well, they commanded respect, and they were behaving well. Their parents were happy With them. They were making progress.
33. But immediately pride set in, the reverse became the case. That is when they would hire their own private apartments. They begin to let people know that they are no longer boys, that they have become adults.
34. What they understood by adolescence is to gather every kind of male and female hooligans in house to make unnecessary noise in the compound where they live, drink excessively, keep late at night, gather foreign women. To them that is what it takes to be an adult. That is stupidity!
35. A wise businessman would always like to be greater than his master. The same way, a wise son would always like to be greater than his father.
36. To children in the secondary school level, that is where your trouble is for now ~ There is no type of hooligan that is not found there, and that is where you begin to spoil yourself because it is at this stage that you think you can have money that can be called your own.
37. Sometimes you can even lend it to your parents not knowing you are spoiling yourself. You have no right to hold your money.
38. If you have a right to have money that can be called your own, you can as well sponsor yourself in school by paying your own school fees, buy your books and buy your school uniform.
39. Every kobo in the hand of a child that is under the parents’ authority is the parents’ money and must be handed over to them because your parents remain your banker. You cannot even keep the money for you don’t know anything good money can fetch. Nobody knows what is good for you at any time more than your parents.
40. So I plead with all of you children. Avoid stealing your parents’ money, which would lead you into stealing some other person’s money, for a petty thief is no smaller than a big thief.
41. Stop telling lies so that your parents can trust you, stand for you, and defend you in all matters.
42. Don’t extort money from your parents so that they can encourage you to continue in your studies because that money you are lavishing would help your parents to train you. And if you really want to be trained, if you understand that it is a privilege and not a right, you will constitute a big encouragement by encouraging yourself and also by taking your education as a challenge and not as a necessity or as a right.
43. Take it as a challenge. Challenge yourself: if it means going without food to make sure I succeed I will do it because, I want to be something. I want to achieve success in life.
44. When your parents see this type of spirit in >
you, they will encourage you the more. But if you lavish the little resources at their disposal, they may be forced to withdraw their aid. Who then suffers in the end? You!
45. Parents, do not say that your children are infants. They are not infants. Punish your children when they err but don’t starve them. No matter. the offence, don’t starve your children. If you starve them you expose them to temptation. Feed
their them very well. Don’t give them money to buy snacks: buy snacks for them.
46. Find out the company your children keep by visiting their school from time to time. Take the child by surprise. Go to the form master or mistress; find out how your children behave in school, Meet the classroom teacher; find out the type of company your child keeps in the school and how responsive he or she is to his or her studies.
47. Don’t end up enrolling your child in school and just go away. This is a joint responsibility. Both the mothers and fathers are involved. If you do not monitor your children while there is hope, the tendency is there for you to lose them and you will surely regret.
48. The joy of the parents remains their children if they are useful. But if they are not useful, what is meant to be a blessing can be a curse. It can cause sorrow, pain, agony, and can bring shame and disrepute even to the entire family.
CHAPTER 7
THE BLESSINGS THAT
ACCOMPANIES OBEDIENCE
Sometime parents cement the bad behaviour of their children. If you spare the training of your children you will reap the whirlwind.
Little children, the first step in obeying God is obeying your parents. When you obey your parents’ instructions, you will live long. You will be disciplined and would be called an intelligent child. People will honour and respect you. You will receive favour from men because your parents may not be the ones to train you.
Some great men today were not trained by their parents.
2. As a child, you don’t know where the wind of life will take you. If you are a good child, somebody by your side will show interest in your welfare. To your surprise, somebody will pick you up and give you favour that will make you a good fellow in life.
3. Sometimes parents cement the bad behaviour of their children. If you spare the training of your children, you will reap the whirlwind.
4. Don’t say your child is too small. No. If he or. she is too small to commit a crime, make yourself big enough to punish the crime. Sometimes children do unimaginable things and get away with them using age as an excuse. But age is never an excuse for evil.
5. Once a child knows what is good and what is bad he becomes accountable for all his doings.
6. On a final note, 1 still stress the need for parents to monitor the behaviour of their children’ when there is still hope. Any time parents spend in monitoring their children is not a waste.
7. Parents should use the holiday period to draw closer to their children as never before. Use the holidays to drive in this message into their hearts. Use the holidays to look into their health.
8. Prepare them for the next classes they are going to. Prepare their minds; don’t use your work as an excuse.
9. Your only hope in marriage lies in your children.
10. Thank you and Remain Blessed in Him eternally.